God’s New Blessed Soldier

Seeing how smart I am and all. I am going to try to make you understand what I want you to understand, so you see what I see and feel what I feel. Hell, I may be a dumb stump of a machine, but I know my rights, and I know I have a right to free speech. And I am going to express my free speech by telling you I ain’t going to let my son be controlled by the Army no more.

No more will I let my son do the Army bidding. No more formation at five in the morning. No more roll call at five thirty in the morning. No more seven in the morning inspection - those god damned Army patrols are making me feel like we can’t escape the will of the Army.

Hell, my son is beginning to beat up on me. I can’t have that. I can’t have my son tell me I am a waste of a citizen because I can’t kill a person without making a noise.

MY SON IS ONE ELEVEN MONTHS OLD! He’s only eleven months old, and he knows how to kill better than me, and I want nothing doing with these people any more. Nothing they got we need. Nothing they go I can’t give.

And I give it all back. ALL OF IT. It’s done. I’ve given it back. Now Army go away.

I got dis’ Army Notice seein’ ma’ history as a .name business is makin’ it hard for dem to be accepting ma boy as one of ‘em. Afraid my past history as some local human wantin’ to get a citizenship whit .name cer-ti-fied-ication is not a way good citizen go about bein’ a citizen of United States of Edenâ„¢.

Notices seein’ I can’t be what I be or ma boy is going to sent back to da Navy. Can’t have dat. No Navy boy ma’ son is, but can’t go stoppin’ being a business. I make good money with da people dat support me. Ain’t no body I know got market on bein’ a true United States of Edenâ„¢ citizen than me. I got this process down. Even see ma’ patriotism for a fee. Gettin’ paid some good money for it. Hell, even dose commies will love United States of Edenâ„¢ if ya’ give ‘em ma product of me.

Army darn did come and come get me. Take me way to cell. Dark in there. Don’t knowin’ why gotta go. No one said nuttin’. Just sit in dark cell. Hopin’ son doin’ fine all time.

Home now. Feelin’ bad. Body hurt. Pain. Can’t move. Son doin’ good. Took ma’ place. Doin’ all that work I was. Try da help. Try, but can’t move body. Sittin’ in cell long.

Alls I wanted is ma’ son in da Army. Wanted dat Army insurance and growth program. Dos good. Ma’ son deserves. Den day trade ‘em to Navy. Navy takes wife. Lost wife. Leave me doin’ woman’s work. Don’t be needin’ this. Got real work ta doin’. This not what I want. Suin’ not me. But got get somethin’ for ma wife. Boy needs it. I need to work. Needs that wife to watch after da’ boy,  DUMB ASS. Suin’ those fucks. God damn. Just fuckin’ wanted to have ma’ son in the Army. Alls I ever wanted was a boy who could have Army Insurance. I never even had dat. Signed away and had to suffer. Now I live. Do good. Get married. And ya’ fuckin’ takin’ it away from me. Wife. Now. Then ma’ boy to Navy. God damn. You evil. I work to pay those taxed. I pray to help God see us through. I’m there. I’m a here for you. But you not here. You not seein’ me. Now maybe you see me now I’ma suin’ ya. Fuck you, Navy. Where’s ma’ wife?

Always did not like dat Navy. Never could trust someone who ain’t fightin’ face ta’ face. Navy not like da’ Army. Least Army gotta get up in yer face to kill ya. Not dose Navy people. They be doin’ things like takin’ yer baby fur no reason. Not tellin’ ya’ fur days and days.

Haven’t still hearin’ from ma’ wife or about ma’ boy. Hopin’ dazy be still givin’ ‘em growth hormones. There be hell ta’ pay if’n he ain’t ready for fightin’ by his third birthday. If ma’ boy is some normal baby not able to aim ‘n shoot don’t knowin’ what to do. Gonna call somebody. Don’t be known who. Someone. Someone in da’ Army. Maybe they know? They know honor. Not this Navy. Navy take ma’ son ‘n ma’ wife. Just want them back. Don’t like the food I cook. And don’t trust ‘em to give ma’ boy hormones.